Tips for a First-Time Dad

Tips For a First-Time Dad

So you're going to become a father. Now is not the time to panic. You've got lots of time to get used to the idea, before that new life you helped create, arrives to join your own. These tips for a first-time Dad will help you to survive the pre-baby and post-birth jitters.

Be supportive of your partner during the pregnancy. Some women have a more difficult time than others, and the fluctuation of hormones can bring on everything from mood swings to what seems to be unreasonable irritation with you, and everything else. While you may not understand her moods, remember that they are transient, and weather them in whatever way works best for you both. She may be irritated, but would appreciate a simple gesture like flowers, a foot rub, or even a cup of tea without having to get up. You'll find your own paths to peace, as the pregnancy progresses.

When the baby arrives, don't be upset if you don't fall in love immediately. You're excited to be a father, but often men think they are failing in some respect, when they don't feel the same overwhelming bond that a mother does. But you didn't carry another life inside you for nine months. So one of the best tips for a first-time Dad, is to give yourself time to love, and be loved back.

Because you have been basically on the "outside" of things until the birth, you may not feel you're really an integral part of their life. Nothing could be further from the truth, because you are now a father, and with that comes all the responsibilities and worries that a mother has.
Parenting isn't done alone, it's done together, with the two of you supporting each other, giving each other breaks from the routine and stresses, as well as taking pleasure in watching your child grow and thrive, together.

If you're anxious about being a daddy, Visit http://www.MalcolmsWeb.com and sign up for free weekly tips that will take the mystery and fear out of parenting your precious little one.

Healthy Eating for Children: Six Simple Rules

Healthy Eating For Children: Six Simple Rules

Rule #1 Make Every Bite Count!

Everything your child eats should be nutritious. Children can be picky and inconsistent, so make sure that what they do eat is really good for them. That way if they end up having two bites of potato for dinner, you can be confident that they at least had a great lunch, snack, etc.
"Where's the fun?" you ask. There is not much room in that little tummy, think carefully before filling it with junk. And ask yourself why you are offering chocolate bars or cookies at snack time. It is often the parent/caregiver who is deriving pleasure from seeing children gleefully down a non-nutritious treat. Your child can derive smiles and joy from many other places - it doesn't have to be junk food.

Rule #2 Ban the word "dessert" from your food-vocabulary, and use "treat" carefully.

Make desserts healthy(not just fun) so that things like fruit, nuts, and yogurt become part of the meal, not the reward for finishing it. All good foods can be treats, but we often think of only junk as such - so use the word judiciously.

By isolating foods under these categories, you may negate their nutritional value to your child if you are following Rule #1. Again it is usually a caregiver that delights in serving a "dessert' or "treat" more than the two-year-old who probably wouldn't care otherwise if they've never had triple chocolate cake with whipped cream.

Rule #3 Be persistent, not insistent.

It may take a child a while to warm up to a new food. Just introduce foods gently time and time again until they try it. Never insist that they try something they don't want to, and certainly never insist that they finish their plate. Mealtime should not be battletime. They will eat if they need to.

If you begin a power struggle over meals, you risk it becoming long-term. The point is to get them to eat healthfully, not develop an association between food and control. This is one reason why developing healthy eating habits early on is so important.

Rule # 4 Break the rules our parents taught us.

Many of us can remember moms putting food on our plates and expecting us to eat it - or not. There were few struggles back then because children quickly learned that if they didn't eat what was served to them, they would go hungry. And after a few nights of sitting at the table by themselves until they finished their peas, they learned to eat them without protest.

We now know how destructive this can be. Many adult eating disorders began in childhood, and many sufferers can remember these episodes at the dinner table as a child.

Respecting that your child's tastebuds and moods are as different from yours as is your spouse's, or your neighbour's means learning to break the rules of the "family meal" from time to time.

Let your child have a "creative" meal made up of healthy foods they like, while the rest of the family has their casserole, curry, or stirfry. So long as it is healthy, and doesn't happen every night of the week, letting a child choose their own meals usually won't create the problems our parents thought it would. It will more likely foster a respect for healthy eating rather than an unhealthy association with mealtime.

Rule # 5 Everyone Needs Breakfast

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day for many, if not all, children.

Missing breakfast can set the tone for their entire day and create a downward spiral of too tired to eat vs. too hungry to nap... and so on. What adult doesn't love to have a hungry and tired child on their hands?

Many studies, and many caregivers, will attest to the fact that a good breakfast helps children function better mentally. While most studies lean toward school age children, this fact should be applied to babies and toddlers as well.

Many signs of the stereotypic "terrible-two" year-old is often hunger. Breakfast should contain some protein for lasting energy, helping to offset the midmorning meltdown. Prevention is the key because a miserable child often won't eat, and you won't obtain your objective of feeding them well.

Rule # 6 Learn from your child

Our children know best more often than we give them credit for. Some tummies are really good at letting their owners know when to eat, and how much to eat. Let children learn how to listen to their bodies - many adults have forgotten. Children never fit into one mold, and another person's rules (such as the preceding 5) usually need to be modified to fit your family. Learn to follow your child's rules from time to time... they may surprise you.

Stacelynn Caughlan is a Clinical Nutritionist and Certified Herbalist who specializes in pregnancy, birth and childhood. She is currently the editor of http://www.motherandchildhealth.com an online resource for women looking for information on natural health and healing for themselves and their families.

The thing with Quality Time

The Thing with Quality Time

It's funny how people seem to think that they have spent quality time with their kids after work by bringing them out to the mall for a lifeless and meaningless stroll only to come home with nothing more than a whole bunch of stuff that they (or the kids) don't need. In fact, time has been wasted because kids don't NEED you to bring them out to the shopping mall to waste time. They want and NEED to be with you.

It's really funny because I used to think taking my kids out for a very casual window-shopping trip was meaningful too until someone pointed out to me that my kids were STILL closer to someone else (their daycaregiver) when compared to me. I mean, what is it with kids, anyway? I take them out, don't I? I try my best to give them whatever they want. I buy them presents, don't I? They have more clothes than me, don't they?

But here's the sad part?.that's not quality time.

Quality time with your kids is just staying home with absolutely nothing to do, just lolling around on the carpet watching 'Blue's Clues' or 'Sesame Street' together giving each other nonchalant kisses and exchanging hugs (and repeated reviews about the show). Spending quality time with the kids involve nothing more than just CONNECTING with the kids, not spending detached moments of dis-connectivity loitering through unfamiliar places. It's about spending time connecting with the kids when you KNOW you've GOT SOMETHING ELSE BETTER TO DO.

I spent one whole Friday thinking about what to do with the kids on Saturday and Sunday and end up with nothing. So, on the weekends, we spent hours in front of the TV coloring bananas, gorillas, and calculator on pieces of paper. We, then, took the bicycle to the park and cycled around. Joshua got scrapes on his knees and Jared was more than unhappy with the fact that his big brother made more 'sand castles' in the park than he did ? but we all came home knowing that we knew each other better.

You see, spending quality time with the kids is all about getting to know your kids. Making an effort to be there for them when you know you CAN be doing something else with your life. We know we can use that time to actually finish off the report or call that important client up ? but the most important thing with quality time with kids is that we DON'T.

© Marsha Maung 2005Please feel free to reprint this article anywhere in your website, magazine, ezine, or other types of publications for free. Please note that you should keep the byline in tact and please provide links back to the web addresses provided in the byline. Thanks.

Marsha Maung is a freelance graphic designer and copy writer who works from home. She designs apparel and premium items at http://www.creativejooz.com and http://www.allmomstuff.com and is the author of "Raising little magicians", and the popular "The Lance in freelancing". More information can be found at http://www.marshamaung.com

A Baby's IQ: Brain Development and Breastmilk...

IQ, Intelligence, and Brain Development- Another Breastfeeding Benefit

Modern parents want to do everything they can to help their children's brain development. Never before have there been so many products and books sold that claim to help parents stimulate their baby's brain, assist in brain development, and give baby an intelligence "edge".

Recently, a variety of studies have come to light that tout the benefits of breastfeeding on brain development and intelligence.

What IS the connection between breastfeeding and intelligence?
It comes down to a couple of important things, some of which are tangible and measurable, and some that are not.

The Importance of Fats and Other Essential Nutrients

Breastmilk contains the ideal ratio of fats, amino acids and other nutrients that baby needs for brain and nervous system development. These ingredients provide the ideal basis for the "hard-wiring" component of a person's intelligence.

For instance, Taurine is an important amino acid found in high concentrations in mother's milk. (In contrast, it is almost nonexistent in cow's milk.) Taurine has an important role in the development of brain tissue, among other things. A baby's body is unable to form Taurine on its own, so s/he is totally reliant on his food to supply this.

Another important ingredient of mom's milk are fats. Breastmilk contains high amounts of important fats, such as DHA and ARA. These are very important components of brain structures, and research has shown that breastfed infants have higher concentration of these essential fats in their brain and blood than do formula fed babies.

Some artificial baby milk manufacturers are adding Taurine and DHA to their formulas, but this does not make these identical to mother's milk. Researchers have concluded that there is an important interplay between all of the components of breastmilk that cause this effect, and that this effect can't be duplicated.
Cholesterol is another ingredient found in high concentrations in breastmilk. It is needed to build tissue in the brain and nervous system. Babies need cholesterol in the first two years of life. (Incidentally, there is evidence that points to a connection between cholesterol in breastmilk and the ability to handle dietery cholesterol in adulthood.)

Studies comparing breastfed children and their formula fed peers in different ages and stages of life show time and again that breastfed infants do better on various tests of intellectual ability. Some have shown these differences persisting for many years.

Even after the differences in socioeconomic status were accounted for or eliminated in these studies, breastfed children still clearly come out ahead.

In fact, one study showed that premature infants who were breastfed had significantly higher IQs than formula fed babies, and when babies were fed a combination of breastmilk and formula, their cognitive scores were directly related to the amount of mother's milk they received.

Hormones- Both Baby's and Mom's

Mother's milk has a high level of endorphins in the first few days after birth. No doubt this helps the baby ease the transition to life outside the womb.

When babies are stressed out, their tiny bodies are in "fight or flight" mode, and essential energy is directed away from growth and development, which would have an obvious effect on the brain.

Additionally, a nursing Mom is biologically a different animal than a non-breastfeeding one.

For instance, when a woman breastfeeds, her body is flooded with pleasure hormones, one of which is Oxytocin, the so called "love hormone", that is also present during orgasm. This hormone helps her to feel relaxed and bonded with her baby. Oxytocin triggers nurturing activity, which no doubt plays a huge role in baby's cognitive and emotional development.

Since lactation suppresses the nervous system response to stressful stimuli, a happy nursing Mommy means a happy baby!

What are some of the intangible benefits that breastfeeding has on brain development and IQ?
Physical Closeness and Emotional Health

In recent years a lot of emphasis has been put on "Emotional Intelligence". How does breastfeeding assist with helping a child develop this?

The closeness of breastfeeding is an important bridge between baby's intrauterine life and his new experience of being out in the world. Studies have shown that babies who receive lots of closeness with their primary caregiver, and lots of stimulating eye contact and "conversation" are getting important brain stimulation that gadgets and toys cannot produce.

That is not to say that a formula feeding Mother doesn't do this, but a breastfeeding baby can't help but have lots of skin to skin contact and interaction with his Mother!

Breastfeeding also gives Mom a chance to reconnect with her busy crawling baby or walking toddler, who seems to spend all his time running from Mom. Having several quiet moments during the day to kiss those dimpled hands, sniff that sweet smelling head, and tickle those fat feet (that will be bigger than your own soon enough) is an important way for Mom and Baby to get that closeness.

The late Dr. Lee Salk, pediatric psychologist, said that "The baby whose cries are answered now will later be the child confident enough to show his independence and curiosity. But the baby left to cry may develop a sense of isolation and distrust, and may turn inward...later in life, this child may continue to cope with stress by trying to shut out reality."

The closeness of breastfeeding makes for a happier baby, one who is settled inside and who trusts that another human will be there to meet his needs, instead of an outside gadget. Don't we want our children learning this important lesson from infancy?

Of course, breastfeeding does not automatically guarantee that a child will be smart, but it can be a way to guarantee that a child lives up to their full genetic potential for emotional intelligence, smarts and IQ!

Carrie Lauth is a breastfeeding counselor who publishes a free newsletter for Moms doing things the natural way. You can get your copy plus extra subscriber goodies at http://www.natural-moms.com

When to start Teaching your Baby

When To Start Teaching Your Baby (1)

When is it that I should start teaching my baby? That is a question that may come to mind for many first time parents; other parents may never consider the question at all, and just leave things to evolve naturally.

In a way, that is an unnecessary question as, whether you like it or not and whether you mean to or not, you begin teaching your baby while it is still in the womb, and then continue through its early years, teenage years, and even into adulthood. So, perhaps it is better to rephrase that question slightly to "when should I consciously start teaching my baby?"

Even with the rephrased question, the answer is the same: while the baby is in the womb. How can that be?
While the baby is in the womb it starts to learn about its environment after about six months of pregnancy, when it is capable of hearing external sounds. Of course, it is aware of its internal environment earlier than that, but there is little you can do to enhance that. But when it comes to the external environment, you are in a position to have some influence even from that early stage of development.

What Can You Teach Your Baby In The Womb?

With the baby in the womb there is clearly a very limited scope for teaching as such. However, you can provide additional stimulation that will form an important part of their learning at that stage. You can provide many hints as to what the outside environment is like, in a way that sets a good foundation for their feeling of love and security.

The main external awareness of a baby in the womb is sound. If you can make the external sounds comforting and welcoming then that will help the baby more than you may think. Music is a proven stimulation to babies, especially classical music; a daily dose of Mozart will stimulate the baby's brain and senses. With any luck, they will become a musical talent, but that is not an issue at this stage of their development.

You do not, of course, have to restrict her to classical music. Whatever music you like, just turn the volume up a bit more than usual to ensure she hears it. The sound will be muffled, but by the time baby is born, she will be used to your musical tastes. Your aim should be to make the outside environment familiar to the baby. Most of that will happen naturally, and she will become used to the daily sounds, such as vacuum cleaner, liquidizer, lawnmower and other domestic noises that are penetrating.

Our baby daughter was born in the Philippines, where our usual form of transport is a tricycle. I do not think it a coincidence that, once she was born, she was contented with the noise of a tricycle; and they are noisy here, I assure you, especially outside the womb! However noisy the tricycle, she would always be asleep within a minute or two, and even now at 20 months is particularly relaxed on a deafening tricycle.

If you want to insist on having a most important sound in the womb, then it must be the voices of the parents. Getting to know the voice of mum and dad will come naturally, but dad especially can get up close and talk to the baby in the womb. It will not talk back of course, but you can rest assured, if she is awake, she will be intrigued by your up close and personal voice. It is something I did every evening with Saffron. That also had the effect of keeping her awake as long as possible during the evening, so she was less restless at night. That can be very helpful for mum to get a good night's sleep.

Another external stimulation which I never learnt about for my now grown up children, and that is light. This can be even more useful for keeping baby awake in the evening. If you take a powerful flashlight, switch it on, and hold it close to mum's tummy, the baby in the womb will respond to it. I must say I thought it a silly idea, until the then unborn Saffron started moving every time the light was switched on. So, the flashlight became another tool in the "keep baby awake in the evening" campaign to stop mum being kicked so much during the night.

Maybe Saffron did not appreciate my "keep her awake" tactics. She was probably wondering "who is this guy keeping me awake all the time; doesn't he realise I want to get some sleep?"

However, she does seem to have done well on it. She has slept like a log all night, every night apart from one, since she was just a few months' old. The odd night? Apparently, a bad dream at 11 pm. A quick cuddle and words of reassurance, and she was back to sleep again.

Whether that has any connection to her in-the-womb experiences, I cannot say for sure. But I will definitely be using the same tactics again next time, if we are blessed with a baby sister or brother for her.

This teaching baby article was written by Roy Thomsitt, owner author of the Bouncing New Baby website. Ably assisted by his baby daughter, he is also responsible for the Baby Blog

Baby Development. What Role do Parents Play?

Baby Development - But What Role do Parents Play?

It is truly amazing the development that a baby experiences in the first year of life. Every week seems to bring another milestone for parents as well as baby! The primary way a baby learns is through play and baby games, it is how they start to make sense of their world. By providing a nurturing and safe environment for our babies we help to promote this learning that aids their early development.

The main groups for baby development in the first year are

1.Cognitive- relating to learning and problem solving
2.Social- relating to language and interacting with others
3.Motor Skills- both fine and gross motor skills.

Learning to crawl and walk as well as pick up small objects.
In the early months babies love their hands and are endlessly occupied just playing with them and putting them into their mouths. Once they start being able to efficiently grasp at objects they will enjoy being given new toys to explore with hands and mouth. Make sure these objects are baby friendly, there is a wide range of baby specific toys to promote learning and exploration at different ages.

Once a baby is able to sit and roll the world takes on a whole new appearance. She is now able to see her surrounding as others do, and rather than passively laying on her back she can move towards something if it interests her. She has gained control of her head and neck and can visually track an object before grabbing for it.

Around this time rosy cheeks may appear as the first teeth start coming through. Some babies sail through teething while others do not cope well at all. Provide plenty of different textures and shapes for chewing. Sugar free icy poles are available which you can hold for your youngster or portions of watermelon or other cool fruits that he will not choke on.

After the first six months babies become much more social, enjoying many more games, particularly those that involve clapping, singing or tickling. Very early in life babies are able to recognise games of anticipation and seem to love knowing that they are going to be tickled, as much as the tickle itself! They will love story time and enjoy the process of turning pages and exploring the textures found in many books. You will find them smiling and playing with those they know but often quite reserved around strangers.

The culmination of all these 'baby steps' in development is that by the time your child turns one he will be close to saying his first words and possibly pulling himself up in preparation for walking. Your once helpless and tiny baby is almost a toddler!

Enjoy the pleasure your baby gets from his play and enjoy your time spent playing with him. Your reactions and words of encouragement mean more than any milestone he may pass.

The place to go for all your games needs for 0-6 year olds is Kids Fun and Games. Educational baby and toddler games, party games, crafts, indoor and outdoor games, festivals and more.

Losing weight after pregnancy

Successful Weight Loss After Pregnancy

How fast you lose weight will depend on a number of factors, including the amount of weight you gained during your pregnancy.
Most women will lose anywhere from 10-14 pounds within the first 2 weeks of delivery. This weight may be attributed primarily to the loss of excess fluid in the body, the baby's weight, the placenta and amniotic fluid.
Some women might lose a little bit less, and others might lose a little bit more.
As the uterus shrinks back down to its normal size and your hormone levels continue to fall, you will lose weight.
Most women gain at least 7 pounds of fat during pregnancy. This fat is meant to help women store energy while breastfeeding. How fast this weight comes off will depend on a number of factors including: genetics, your overall health, diet and exercise.
You should expect that it will take a little bit of time to lose the weight you gained during pregnancy.
It did after all take you nine months to put that weight on! Many women have successfully lost weight however, in just a few short months after a delivery.Some women will hang on to the last few pounds they have to lose until they stop breastfeeding.
Your body may want to cling to a few extra pounds to ensure you have enough energy to provide adequate milk for the baby. Every woman's experience is unique with respect to this.
The good news is that with a solid nutritional program and with moderate exercise, you can expect to lose the weight you gained during pregnancy within a reasonable time frame.
Most women will be back to their pre pregnancy weight within nine months of delivering IF they follow a regular exercise program and eat healthily after delivery.
That said some women will lose their pregnancy weight in as little as six to twelve weeks!
Article by Beverley Brooke, visit http://www.pregnancy-weight-loss.com for more on weight loss after pregnancy